“Do everything in a dignified and orderly way” (1 COR. 14:40).
1, 2. What does Jehovah want for engaged couples?
Jehovah wants the bride and groom to thoroughly enjoy their wedding day and have a very happy marriage. Furthermore, he wants their wedding to honor him. That is, he not only wants them to be happy on that special day, but he also wants everything to be done in a way that pleases him and that marks the beginning of a marriage in which Jehovah always comes first.
WHY HONOR JEHOVAH
3. What should Christian couples consider when planning their wedding, and why?
When planning their wedding, couples should consider the principles Jehovah has set out in his Word. Jehovah is the Creator of marriage, and he was the one who married the first two humans, Adam and Eve. Therefore, for engaged couples, God’s viewpoint should always be the most important.
4. What is another good reason to take Jehovah’s viewpoint into account when organizing a wedding?
Another good reason to consider Jehovah’s viewpoint when planning a wedding is that he is our heavenly Father and our best friend. Of course, we want to protect our friendship with him and avoid anything that happens on that day, or at any other time, that might hurt or offend him. Thinking about all that he has done for us motivates us to honor him on our wedding day and throughout our marriage.
HOW TO HONOR JEHOVAH
5. How can the Bible help engaged couples make good decisions about their wedding?
The Bible can help engaged couples make good decisions about their wedding because, although it doesn't contain a list of rules about how a wedding or the subsequent celebration should be, it does contain Bible principles that can help them make the best choices. If the couple allows themselves to be guided by Bible principles, whatever decisions they make about their wedding, they will honor Jehovah and make him happy.
6. Why is it important for engaged couples to meet the legal requirements for marriage? (Romans 13:1, 2).
It is important that the couple meets the legal requirements to get married, because in most countries the laws establish certain requirements that must be met in order to get married.
Furthermore, as Christians, we obey the laws of the country or community where we live. Therefore, it is important to find out what the requirements are where you live. If necessary, you can ask the elders for help.
7. What kind of atmosphere should there be at weddings?
Weddings should reflect God's spirit, not the spirit of the world. For example, a Bible-based wedding speech, delivered with love, affection, and dignity, helps guests see that marriage is a gift from God. That is why many couples choose a Kingdom Hall for their ceremony.
8. What can the bride and groom do to create a dignified atmosphere at the celebration? (Romans 13:13).
To ensure a dignified atmosphere at the celebration, the couple should make sure it doesn't reflect the spirit of the world. If they decide to serve alcoholic beverages, they should take precautions beforehand to prevent anyone from drinking too much.
If there will be music, please ensure it is kept at a volume that allows attendees to converse comfortably. It is also important to consider the type of music played and the content of the lyrics to avoid offending anyone.
9. What should the couple take into account regarding what will be done during the celebration?
The couple should consider whether the words, images, videos, or any other form of entertainment presented are appropriate and uplifting. They should ask themselves if what is presented will be worthy, demonstrate respect for their marriage, and, above all, honor Jehovah.
While some humor is acceptable, indecent or sexually suggestive comments should be avoided. Furthermore, it's important to ensure that all participants understand and respect the couple's wishes.
10. Why should couples be modest when organizing their wedding? (1 John 2:15-17).
When planning their wedding, couples should be modest, because Jehovah values his servants' efforts to honor him rather than focusing on themselves. For this reason, they should avoid ostentation, that is, showing off what they don't have, and not spend excessive sums of money.
Furthermore, by having a simple wedding, they can avoid unnecessary debt and thus continue providing their services without worry. Also, by keeping things simple, they'll have fewer decisions to make and fewer disagreements, saving themselves a lot of stress.
ILLUSTRATION
Images of brother and sister weddings in different parts of the world. 1. In a Kingdom Hall, the bride and groom are seated facing the brother who is giving the wedding talk. 2. At an outdoor wedding reception, a brother and sister are congratulating the newlyweds. 3. Two newlyweds are lining up with their guests to serve themselves buffet-style food. 4. At an outdoor wedding, the bride and groom are standing facing the brother who is giving the talk.
Anywhere in the world, we Witnesses can celebrate simple, beautiful weddings that we will remember fondly. (See paragraphs 10 and 11.)
11. How can the bride and groom show modesty in their dress and grooming? (See also the pictures.)
The bride and groom demonstrate modesty in their attire when their clothing choices, while perhaps slightly different from what they might wear on other occasions, are decent and appropriate. Furthermore, they should not allow their clothing or any other material possessions to become the focal point of the wedding.
12. Why should engaged couples make sure to reject customs that are not in accordance with what the Bible says?
Couples must make sure to reject customs that are not in accordance with what the Bible says, because Jehovah clearly warns us that we must stay away from all such impure things.
In Satan's world, weddings often include customs related to false religion, the occult, or superstitions. For this reason, couples should learn about the customs and traditions common in their communities.
13. How can engaged couples show that they view gifts as Jehovah does?
The bride and groom can show that they view gifts as Jehovah does by ensuring that guests don't feel obligated to give a gift or that a simple present won't be enough. They should strive to see gifts as Jehovah does and express gratitude for any gift they receive, valuing it for the love with which it is given rather than for its material worth.
HOW TO RESOLVE CERTAIN SITUATIONS
14. What difficulties do some couples face?
Some couples face cultural, family, and social pressures when planning their wedding. These situations can make the planning process a real challenge for those who want to honor Jehovah.
It can be difficult to keep a wedding simple when your culture expects you to invite many people. You may also face pressure from family members to have a bigger or more lavish celebration. In some places, comparisons with other weddings and the importance placed on social standing also play a role.
15. Why is it important to pray about everything related to the wedding?
It is important to pray about everything related to the wedding because when the bride and groom talk to Jehovah about any decisions they have to make and any concerns they have, he will help them to make better choices, to stay calm when they are stressed, and to be courageous when necessary.
Furthermore, as they see how Jehovah answers their prayers, their trust in him will grow stronger and they will truly see how he helps them maintain peace.
16, 17. Why is good communication important when organizing a wedding?
Good communication is essential when planning a wedding, as it requires the couple to make many decisions, such as the date, guest list, and budget. Before making each decision, it's crucial that they discuss together the applicable biblical principles and seek advice from mature Christians.
When expressing their opinions, they should be kind, understanding, and flexible, especially when family members make reasonable requests; in such cases, they should try to accommodate them. If they cannot accept a request, they should explain their reasons tactfully and caringly.
18. What will help the bride and groom to make everything go as planned? (1 Corinthians 14:40; see also the picture.)
Having everything well-organized will help the couple ensure that everything goes as planned. By planning carefully, they will likely experience less stress on their wedding day. It's important to show respect for the guests by doing everything possible to adhere to the established schedule.
In addition, a few days before the wedding they could have a small meeting with those who offered to help them, review the preparations and rehearse some parts of the ceremony to make sure that everything goes as planned.
ILLUSTRATION
A couple who are already engaged are explaining their wedding plans to several friends who are going to help them. The groom is showing them the seating arrangements for the reception on a tablet.
Planning the wedding carefully will help ensure that everything goes as planned. (See paragraph 18).
19. What will help the bride and groom control what happens during the reception?
It will help the couple to be proactive and plan ahead to control what happens during the reception. For example, taking steps to prevent uninvited guests from attending.
In addition, they can explain to family members who are not Witnesses what our weddings are like and how certain customs are observed; they can even show them the article on jw.org “What are Jehovah’s Witness weddings like?”
They can also designate a mature brother as "banquet director" to oversee the reception and help ensure that everything runs smoothly and according to plan.
20. What should couples keep in mind?
The bride and groom should keep in mind that their wedding day is just one day, the first of what could be a wonderful life together serving Jehovah. Therefore, they should do their best to make it a dignified and simple occasion. If they allow themselves to be guided by Jehovah, they will be able to enjoy a wedding that, in time, they will look back on with a smile.
WHAT WOULD YOU ANSWER?
Why do couples want their wedding to honor Jehovah?
The couple wants their wedding to honor Jehovah because he is the Creator of marriage, and his viewpoint should be paramount when organizing the ceremony. Furthermore, Jehovah is their heavenly Father and their best friend, and they want to protect their friendship with him by ensuring that nothing that happens on that day—or any other—will hurt or offend him.
What will help the couple create a dignified and appropriate atmosphere on their wedding day?
It will help them to ensure that the ceremony reflects the fruit of God's Spirit and not the spirit of the world. The groom, as head of the new family, should contribute to making the wedding a dignified and joyous occasion.
It is also important to plan the reception in a way that does not reflect the spirit of the world: control alcohol consumption, keep the music at a volume that allows for comfortable conversation, and carefully review the type of music and song lyrics so that no one feels offended.
How will couples benefit if they choose to have a simple wedding?
If the couple chooses to have a simple wedding, they will avoid unnecessary debt, allowing them to continue their service to Jehovah without worries.
They'll have fewer decisions to make and fewer disagreements, which reduces stress during the preparations. That way, they'll enjoy their wedding day more and be able to remember the occasion fondly, even if the celebration is simple.
Furthermore, being modest in dress and grooming shows respect for Jehovah and prevents material things from becoming the highlight of the wedding, contributing to a balanced and dignified atmosphere.
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