LIVING AS CHRISTIANS, Week of March 17 to 23, 2025, Do everything possible to remain chaste during courtship. Video: How to prepare for marriage Part 1: Am I ready for a date? (fragment). Analysis and Answers.

LIVING AS CHRISTIANS, March 17-23, 2025, Do everything possible to stay chaste during courtship. Video: How to prepare for marriage Part 1: Am I ready for a date? (fragment). Analysis and Answers.

Do your best to remain chaste during courtship (15 mins.) Discussion with audience.

Play the VIDEO How to prepare for marriage. Part 1: Am I ready for a date? (fragment). Then ask:

Why shouldn't someone start a courtship without being ready to get married? (Pr 13:12; Lu 14:28-30).

Starting a courtship without being ready for marriage can be dangerous because it can create expectations that are not well founded. According to Proverbs 13:12, hope that is not fulfilled can cause much suffering. Additionally, in Luke 14:28-30 we are taught that before starting something important, like a project, we must be sure that we have what it takes to finish it well. Dating is an important step toward marriage, and if we're not ready to make a serious commitment, we can cause pain to other people and ourselves if things don't work out.

ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

A courtship should be based on preparation for a serious commitment, such as marriage. If a person enters a relationship without being ready to get married, they run the risk of becoming emotionally involved without a clear vision of what a marriage entails, which can lead to confusion and hurt if the relationship does not progress in that direction.

Preparing for marriage is not only about being ready emotionally, but also spiritually. Unprepared, a person may commit to someone for the wrong reasons, such as physical attraction or social pressure, which could lead to a relationship that does not have a solid and lasting foundation, and which in the end can cause suffering for both parties.

No one should begin a courtship without being ready for marriage, because, as the Bible teaches, love and relationships must have a clear and serious purpose. In Proverbs 13:12, it is taught that starting a relationship without a defined objective can lead to frustration and disappointment, while in Luke 14:28-30, Jesus indicates that you cannot start building without first calculating the expenses, in order to know if you can finish the work. Because, otherwise, you run the risk of becoming the ridicule of others.

The biblical texts cited teach that a courtship without adequate preparation for marriage can result in hasty decisions, lack of emotional and spiritual maturity, and, ultimately, a failure that could have been avoided with patience and wisdom.

As we see, a relationship requires responsibility and emotional maturity, qualities that develop over time and experience. If you are not ready for the commitment of marriage, you are probably not ready to handle the challenges that arise in the relationship. As Lili mentioned in her experience, waiting and preparing is not wasting time, but rather focusing on strengthening the relationship with Jehovah and cultivating Christian qualities that will be essential in a future marriage, so that it goes well.

What did you like most about how these parents helped their daughter?

What I liked most is that the daughter's parents were wise and careful in guiding her, helping her make decisions based on sound principles. They not only gave her advice, but also helped her understand that dating is not just a fun time, but a preparation for a serious commitment like marriage. Instead of pressuring her, they guided her to make wise decisions and think well about the future.

ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

What stands out about the way these parents helped their daughter is that they did not impose their own wishes, but rather guided her with wisdom. They taught her to make informed decisions, based on principles that would benefit her in the long term, such as the importance of prayer, Bible study, and reflection on important life decisions, which is fundamental in the Christian path.

The parents showed a balanced approach, giving their daughter space to make her own decisions, but also offering a framework of principles to help her make wise decisions. This shows that love and guidance is not always about controlling the person, but rather supporting them in their development so that they are able to make decisions for themselves that are wise and aligned with Christian values.

It is notable that instead of scolding her or making her feel ashamed, they created an environment of trust where Lili was able to express her feelings freely. The mother showed empathy by sharing her own experiences from her youth, which helped Lili feel understood. The father, for his part, researched jw.org and used the Bible to guide her, such as when he asked her to read Psalm 32:8, which highlights the importance of listening to Jehovah's direction to make wise decisions, which allowed Lili to reflect.

I liked that these parents encouraged honest, non-judgmental communication, which allowed Lili to feel comfortable sharing her feelings. On the other hand, the parents gave their daughter practical tools to meditate and make wise decisions when they discussed this topic in their family worship, when they provided her with well-selected jw.org articles for her to analyze and meditate on, and when they used appropriate biblical texts to guide her reasoning.

I liked that instead of prohibiting or imposing her personal preferences or criteria, the parents helped Lili see for herself that waiting was not a waste of time, but rather an opportunity to prepare herself spiritually and emotionally to choose her future husband well and to build a stable and happy marriage. Another notable point is that the parents worked together as a true team in order to help their daughter.

Read Proverbs 28:26. Then ask:

What measures can a couple take to avoid possible temptations?

A couple can take several steps to avoid temptations. Proverbs 28:26 says that he who trusts in his own understanding is reckless. This teaches us that, when dealing with situations that might tempt us, we need to rely on the wise counsel of others, above all, on biblical principles. Couples can avoid being alone in secluded places or in situations that could put them in danger. It is also important to maintain control over emotions and decisions, such as avoiding conversations or actions that could lead to temptation.

ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

An important measure to avoid temptations is to set clear limits regarding the amount of time you spend together and under what circumstances. For example, avoid being left alone in situations that could lead to inappropriate behavior. The key is to maintain a balance between emotional closeness and respect for established limits.

Additionally, it is crucial that the couple support each other in making wise decisions and help each other stand firm in their principles. This could include holding each other accountable and having open, honest conversations about any temptations or challenges you may face. A group of friends or church members who also share similar principles can be a good support in this regard.

Proverbs 28:26 warns us against the folly of trusting only our feelings or impulses, as the heart can be deceitful. Hence, the couple must establish clear limits and respect them to avoid situations that could put their moral integrity at risk. For example, they can avoid being alone in private places or at inappropriate times, following the principle of 1 Corinthians 10:12, as we see in the image.

Another thing you can do is what Lili, the girl in the video, did: focus on strengthening your relationship with Jehovah through personal study, prayer, and participation in spiritual activities, as this will help you maintain a correct perspective on the relationship and also help you resist temptations.

Why is it wise to talk about what limits you'll put on displays of affection, like holding hands and kissing?

Talking about boundaries is very wise because affection can be a beautiful thing, but it can also lead to situations that are not appropriate if you are not careful. By setting clear boundaries, you can both protect yourself from giving in to temptation and ensure that the relationship remains respectful and focused on what really matters: a future seriously committed relationship. This will also help you feel calmer, knowing that you both agree on what is appropriate in your relationship.

ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

It is prudent to talk about the limits of showing affection because dating is a stage of growth and maturity, and establishing limits allows you to maintain the focus on knowing and understanding the other from an emotional and spiritual perspective, without letting physical or emotional impulses cloud your decisions.

By setting these boundaries, couples also show mutual respect and responsibility in the relationship. This will help them avoid uncomfortable situations or situations that could create misunderstandings within the couple or with other people. Additionally, it gives you the opportunity to strengthen your connection without external pressures, and at the same time, prevents your relationship from becoming an obstacle to your relationship with God.

Setting boundaries beforehand is important because this will help them avoid situations that could excite inappropriate emotions or desires and harm their moral purity. Furthermore, these boundaries would reflect mutual respect and a sincere desire to please Jehovah.

Talking openly about boundaries would avoid confusion and assure you that you both have the same purpose, which would strengthen trust in the relationship. On the other hand, physical displays of affection can generate intense emotions that, if left uncontrolled, can lead to inappropriate behavior, so having clear boundaries helps maintain the couple's emotional and spiritual health.

By defining boundaries, the couple demonstrates that they value their relationship with Jehovah more than their personal desires, which is an example of spiritual maturity. So, if you get married, having established boundaries will have helped you cultivate self-control and mutual respect, essential qualities for a happy, long-lasting marriage blessed by Jehovah.

Read Ephesians 5:3, 4. Then ask:

What should couples be careful with when talking on the phone or on social media?

Couples should be careful not to speak or act inappropriately, especially when in contact via phone or social media. Ephesians 5:3, 4 tells us that we should not allow even mentions of immoral things or vulgar language in our conversations. Social media and phones can be very useful tools, but they can also lead to uncomfortable or inappropriate situations if we are not careful with what we share or how we communicate.

ADDITIONAL COMMENTS

Bride and groom should be especially careful with what they say and how they say it, as written or spoken words can be misinterpreted. On social media, communication can be more distant and less personal, which can lead to misunderstandings or even inappropriate behavior. It is important to ensure that your interactions follow Christian principles, such as purity and mutual respect.

Additionally, they should be aware that social media has a broader reach, so what they post or share can have an impact not only on themselves, but also on those around them, such as friends, family or even the congregation. Maintaining healthy and respectful communication, based on mutual respect and Christian values, is key to avoiding any negative influence that may arise from misunderstandings or misinterpretations.

They should be careful to keep their conversations pure and respectful, avoiding any topics or language that could lead to immorality or immodesty. As Ephesians 5:3, 4 says, things that are not appropriate for holy people should not even be mentioned. This includes avoiding suggestive conversations, obscene jokes, or comments that may excite inappropriate emotions.

The couple should focus on uplifting topics, such as their spiritual progress, personal goals, or activities that strengthen their relationship with Jehovah. Additionally, it is important that you avoid spending too much time in private conversations on the phone or on your social networks, as this could lead to premature emotional intimacy or neglecting other spiritual and personal responsibilities.