1. Why doesn't Jehovah compare us with others?
JEHOVAH loves variety. You just have to see his amazing creation, including humans. No two people are alike, so Jehovah never compares us to others. He looks at our heart, who we are inside (1 Sam. 16: 7). It also takes into account our strengths, our weaknesses, and our past. And he does not ask us for more than we can give. We have to follow his example and see ourselves as he sees us. If we do so, we will show "good judgment" and will not think of ourselves more or less than we should (Rom. 12: 3).
2. Why is it not good for us to compare ourselves with others?
Of course, there is nothing wrong with looking to the example of a brother who is very skilled in the ministry (Heb. 13: 7). That can help us to be better teachers (Philippians 3:17). But it is not the same to look at someone's good example to imitate them than to determine if we are better or worse. If we compare ourselves with others, we can become envious, discouraged, or even feel that we are worthless. As we saw in the previous article, competing with other brothers in the congregation would also harm our friendship with Jehovah. That is why he lovingly tells us: "Let each one examine his own actions, and then he will have reason to rejoice over what he himself has done, without comparing himself to another person" (Gal. 6: 4).
3. What progress in your service to Jehovah makes you happy?
Jehovah wants us all to rejoice in the spiritual progress we have made. For example, if we have been baptized, we have reason to be very happy that we have reached that goal. It was a personal decision motivated by our love for Jehovah. Let's think about what we've improved since then. For example, we may enjoy reading and studying the Bible much more. Perhaps our prayers are deeper and more heartfelt (Ps. 141: 2). We may be more skilled at initiating conversations and using our tools in preaching. And Jehovah may have helped us to better fulfill our role as husband, wife, father or mother. We can be very happy and satisfied with the progress we have made in these fields.
4. What will we see in this article?
We can help others rejoice in what they can do in their service to Jehovah and not compare themselves with others. In this article, we will see how parents can help their children, how husbands can help each other, and how elders and the rest of the congregation can help their siblings. And finally we will look at some biblical principles that will help us set reasonable goals that fit our circumstances and personal capabilities.
WHAT PARENTS AND MARRIAGES CAN DO
5. According to Ephesians 6: 4, what should parents not do?
Parents should not compare one child to another or ask him for more than he can give. Negative comparisons and unreasonable demands can be very frustrating for a child (read Ephesians 6: 4). A sister named Sachiko * says, “My teachers expected me to get better grades than my peers. Also, my mother wanted me to be a good student to give a good testimony to my teachers and to my father, who is not a Witness. In fact, I wanted my test score to be perfect, but that was impossible. Even though I finished school years ago, sometimes I think that no matter how much I do, it will seem little to Jehovah. "
6. What can parents learn from Psalm 131: 1, 2?
Parents can learn an important lesson from Psalm 131: 1, 2 (read it). King David said, "I do not aspire to things that are too great or beyond my reach." Thanks to his humility and modesty, he felt "calm and reassured." This teaches parents that they can be humble and modest not only in what they expect of themselves, but also in what they expect of their children. They should take into account their strengths and weaknesses when setting goals for their children to feel good about themselves. A sister named Marina recalls: “My mother never compared me with my three brothers or with other children. He taught me that we all have different abilities and that we are all valuable to Jehovah. Thanks to her, I hardly ever compare myself to others. "
ILLUSTRATION:
Some parents and their three children make a Noah's ark and put some animals on it.
Parents, show each of your children that you value their efforts. (See paragraphs 5 and 6.) *
7, 8. How can a husband honor his wife?
Christian husbands are to honor their wife (1 Pet. 3: 7). That means they have to give her special attention and treat her with respect. How can they do it? By showing you value her, not asking her for more than she can give, and certainly not comparing her to other women. What effect could these comparisons have? Let's look at the case of a sister named Rosa. Her husband, who is not a Witness, is in the habit of comparing her to other women. With his cruel words, he has not only shattered Rosa's self-esteem, but also makes her doubt if anyone really loves her. She says: "I need to be constantly reminded that Jehovah values me." In contrast, Christian husbands honor their wife, knowing that this is how they care for their relationship with her and with Jehovah. *
Husbands who honor their wife speak well of her, tell her they love her, and congratulate her (Prov. 31:28). That's what Katerina's husband, mentioned in the previous article, did to help her improve her self-esteem. When Katerina was little, her mother looked down on her and often compared her to other girls, including her friends. So Katerina started comparing herself to others, even after learning the truth. But her husband has helped her fight this trend and have a more reasonable opinion of herself. She says, “My husband loves me, congratulates me on the good things I do, and prays for me. It also reminds me of Jehovah's beautiful qualities and helps me correct my negative thoughts. "
WHAT ELDERLY AND THE REST OF THE CONGREGATION CAN DO
9, 10. How did the elders help a sister who tended to compare herself to others?
How can the elderly help those who tend to compare themselves to others? Let's look at the experience of a sister named Hanuni, who was rarely told in her childhood that she had done something right. She says: “I was shy and felt like the other kids were better than me. As far as I can remember, I have always compared myself to other people. " Even after becoming a Witness, Hanuni continued to compare herself to others, making her feel like she was contributing little to the congregation. But now she is a happy pioneer. What helped you change?
Hanuni says she received the help and love of the elders. They assured her that they trusted her and congratulated her on her good example. Hanuni recounts: “Sometimes the elders asked me to encourage some sisters who needed help. That made me feel like the congregation needed me. I remember the elders lovingly thanking me for encouraging some younger sisters and then reading 1 Thessalonians 1: 2, 3. That touched my heart. Thanks in large part to those excellent pastors, I now know that I have a valuable place in Jehovah's organization. "
11. How can we help the “crushed ones” mentioned in Isaiah 57:15?
(Read Isaiah 57:15). Jehovah cares a great deal about "the crushed." All of us, not just the elderly, can encourage our dear brothers who feel this way. One way to do this is by taking a heartfelt interest in them. Jehovah wants us to show them how much he loves his sheep. --Prov. 19:17. Another way to help them is by being humble and modest. We don't draw attention to ourselves because we don't want to arouse envy. We prefer to use our skills and knowledge to encourage one another (1 Pet. 4:10, 11).
12. Why did humble people like to be with Jesus? (See the drawing on the cover).
We can learn a lot about how to treat others by looking at how Jesus treated his disciples. Although he was the most important man in history, he was "gentle and lowly in heart" (Matt. 11: 28-30). He was not showing off his amazing intelligence and immense knowledge. When he taught, he used simple language and engaging examples that touched the hearts of humble people (Luke 10:21). Unlike the arrogant religious leaders, Jesus made people feel that they were valuable to God (John 6:37). He always treated ordinary people with respect.
ILLUSTRATION:
Jesus and some of his disciples sitting around a bonfire. One of them plays the flute and the others sing and clap their hands.
The disciples of Jesus liked being with him because he never had an air of superiority. He loved spending time with his friends. (See paragraph 12).
13. Why do we say that Jesus treated his disciples with kindness and love?
Jesus treated his disciples with kindness and love. He knew they had different abilities and circumstances, so not all of them could take on the same responsibilities or do the same in ministry. But Jesus valued the efforts of heart that each one made. We can clearly see his understanding attitude in the parable of the talents. In that account, he spoke of a master who entrusted each slave with work "according to his ability." It is true that of the two slaves who fulfilled their task, there was one who earned more than the other. But the master congratulated them both with these same words: "Well done, good and faithful slave!" (Mat. 25: 14-23).
14. How can we follow Jesus' example in treating others?
Jesus also treats us with kindness and love. He knows that we have different capacities and circumstances, and he is happy when each one of us does our best. How can we follow their example? We do not want any brother to feel inferior or ashamed because he cannot do as much as others. Rather, let us always look for opportunities to congratulate our brothers for giving Jehovah the best of themselves.
SET REASONABLE GOALS
15, 16. How did you help a sister set reasonable goals?
Setting goals in our service to Jehovah helps us stay on track and with purpose in life. But these goals must be tailored to our abilities and circumstances, not to those of others. Otherwise, we will end up frustrated and discouraged (Luke 14:28). Let's look at the example of a pioneer named Midori.
When Midori was a child, her father - who is not a Witness - humiliated her by comparing her to her brothers and her classmates. She says, "I felt like I was worthless." But over the years his self-esteem improved. Midori recounts: "I read the Bible every day because it gave me inner peace and made me feel the love of Jehovah." In addition, she set reasonable goals and asked Jehovah to help her achieve them. In this way, she was glad about what she could do in her service to Jehovah.
ILLUSTRATION:
Series of images: 1. A sister looks at the calendar while her little boy plays nearby. 2. The same sister is preaching with another sister and shows a video to a lady. The sister's son holds a treaty.
We will be happy if we set reasonable goals and achieve them. (See paragraphs 15 and 16.) *
LET'S KEEP GIVING JEHOVAH THE BEST OF US
17. How can Christians “keep renewing their thinking,” and what will be the results?
Negative thoughts and feelings don't go away overnight. Hence, Jehovah advises us: “You must keep renewing your thinking.” - Eph. 4:23, 24. Of course, to achieve this we have to pray, study the Word of God and meditate on it. Let us not stop doing these things and ask Jehovah for strength. His holy spirit will help us correct the tendency to compare ourselves to others. Jehovah will also help us to see if we have become proud or envious, and to act immediately to free ourselves from these shortcomings.
18. How do the words of 2 Chronicles 6:29, 30 comfort you?
(Read 2 Chronicles 6:29, 30). Jehovah knows our hearts. He also knows that we are fighting against the spirit of the world and against our own imperfections. When you see all the efforts we make in this fight, your love for us grows deeper and deeper.
19. What example does Jehovah use to express his feelings for us?
To express his feelings for us, Jehovah uses the example of a mother's love for her baby. --Is. 49:15. A mother named Rachel says, “My daughter Stephanie was premature. The first time I saw her she looked so tiny and defenseless ... For the first month, she was in an incubator, but the doctor allowed me to hold her in my arms every day. Those beautiful moments created a very special bond between the two. She is six years old now and smaller than other children her age, but I love her with all my heart because she clung to life. It has made me very happy ”. When Jehovah sees us strive with all our might to give him our best, he has such a deep love for us. Doesn't knowing that comfort us a lot?
20. Why can we rejoice?
Each servant of Jehovah occupies a special and valuable place in his diverse family. Jehovah did not bring us to him because we were better than others, but because he looked into our hearts and saw that we were meek and willing to be taught and shaped by him (Ps. 25: 9). We can be sure that you are glad when we do all we can in your service. Our endurance and our faithfulness show that we have “a sincere and good heart” (Luke 8:15). So let's keep giving Jehovah our best. If we do, we will have reason to be happy about what we have done ourselves.
WHAT WOULD YOU ANSWER?
How can parents help their children rejoice in what they can do in their service to Jehovah?
You can help them by not comparing them, nor by making unreasonable demands on them, helping them to see that Jehovah loves them and values everything they do to serve him.
What can elders do to make those in their care feel loved and valued?
They can remind them how much Jehovah loves them. They can also make them feel useful by helping others in the congregation and then congratulating them on their good work.
Why are we happy to give Jehovah our best?
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